Fisting, perhaps

What the hell is it with the "fist bump" these days? Is it tantamount to a high-five? Has it supplanted the high-five? Can I do it with girls?

It is less binding than a handshake, but also more personal. I suppose it shares space with the handshake-hug, perhaps filling in where homoerotic undertones are unappreciated, like after a hard mountain bike ride or a game of racketball. (After all, it is well-documented that strenuous exercise and hugging may lead to gay sex.) Golf, on the other hand, needs the handshake-hug. Fist-bumping works for that awesome approach shot you dropped five feet from the pin but falls short of recognizing the awesomeness of the 5-hour walk you just took with your buddy.

Theorem:

The level of inter-personal physical acknowledgement is inversely proportional to the energy concentration of the acknowledeged activity.

Topics in Sociology

Today's topic: The sociological implications of multiplayer games wherein the winner is decided based almost entirely upon chance. Discuss.

Social Contraction

As soon as we entered into the social contract with our fellow man we started down the path toward sacrificing all our individual liberties for the sake of others' individual liberties. Everyone is sacrificing, however, so no one will have any left.

Rather than agreeing to disagree, we all just agree to not have an opinion at all.

Procrastination

You can cram for a test you are taking the next day.

You can scramble at the last minute to meet a deadline at work.

But you can't make up for the live you haven't lived the moment before you realize it is over.

Plan C